By Guest Blogger Virgina LeGall

The saying, “It’s not the destination but the journey that counts” is often used in quick conversation and as an anecdote for when life is a little tough.

So much of our time is spent thinking about ourselves, our wishes to be free and happy one minute, then in the next minute we are worrying about how the morning meeting might pan out and how we are going to cope with that person who challenges us at work.

It’s easy to get exhausted just thinking about all this chatter on the first journey of your day – the morning commute!

The truth behind this journey/destination thing is that both really don’t matter that much. In fact, the thing that counts the most in all this is the knowing and acceptance that we are here in this moment – together… alive, and hopefully well. Mindful of what we are doing and acknowledging that others are also experiencing this ‘aliveness’ alongside us.

I recently heard a Buddhist nun speaking to a group of people about the Self, reminding the audience that while we are all busy with the… I …Me and…My statements, the truth is everything we have, use or enjoy has been shared with us by others. We are never alone.

Try and think of an example where others have not put effort, love and work into the items we use and the things we do.

You could say, well I grow my own vegetables so no one has helped with this… Are you sure? How about the gardener who picked the seeds and the factory worker who packaged them ready to go on the shelves? Not forgetting – the person who works at the water plant who helps keep the water pumping through the taps so you can fill up the watering can to water those lovely blooms!

The books we read, the food we eat the lives we share… you get my drift…

The Journey of Life could, therefore, be seen as a simple acknowledgement that we are what we share and that rather than focusing purely on ourselves we should perhaps all try and share a little more loving kindness towards each other.

I spent over twenty years in London being surrounded by some amazing people and enjoyed the friends I met, the work I did and the buzz of the city. But during this time I realised that so many of us were so busy on the ‘self-journey’ that sometimes we missed the moments of kindness and compassion with others on our path.

The ten year anniversary of 7/7 brought back the memory of one of the most profound moments of my life when I was working in a hospital in East London and individuals displayed loving kindness to strangers in the most challenging of circumstances… Here – there was no I, Me or My. Just ‘Us’.

It’s interesting how in such extreme circumstances or moments of crisis, we can unconditionally display these acts of love and care for each other. So why is it so hard to do this every day?

To be alive and accepting of this moment with others is what counts and may help to lighten the load, quieten the chatter and self inflicted pressure of being in the  “I, Me and My mode”. Ultimately, life is not about the final destination as a lone  traveller but a journey made alongside many other fellow travellers – each criss crossing our path in their own unique way.


Author Biog


Virginia WilcoxVirginia LeGall is a specialist public health nurse based in the South West. Having lived in London for the last 25 years she has moved with her family to live a quieter life by the sea.